I’ve never been much of a journaler. When I was a child, I had a diary that had a lock and key, and I wrote my little heart away in there for a short while. It’s where my thoughts and feelings lived as I sought to make sense of my nine-year-old world. But somehow, within the mess of adulthood, I’ve lost that sense of wanting to write my feelings out as a means to process, only for my eyes to see. I tend to write only to encourage others, but lately, it’s been leaving me feeling empty.
As I write to encourage others in their faith, I find myself struggling to make sense of the world and my place in it and what words I even have to offer. I find myself with little to give because I’ve offered little for myself in my personal processing. My desire to encourage and offer perspective is a good, God-given desire, but I cannot do so if I’m not taking time to process my own thoughts and feelings and allow God to personally encourage me first. I cannot offer more to others than what I offer to myself.
I’m giving myself permission to care for myself and meet my own needs and allow God to minister to my heart. It’s easy to get lost in what I can offer others without thinking of what God offers me daily: grace for my failures, peace for my weary heart, love despite my sinfulness, healing for my brokenness, and freedom from my shame. I’m processing and leaning deeper into God’s goodness and mercy that he has for me, and somewhere in there, I’m feeling more at home within myself.
One of the ways that I’m looking within myself and finding home there is by living out of a set of core values. A few months ago, after reading too many Brene Brown books, I began assessing what my core values and beliefs were. I found that there were many things that I found important, but I find myself confused and lost within myself when I have too many values and beliefs competing for my attention.
I’ve narrowed it down to three, and I’m beginning the habit of looking at my life through the lens of these three values: faith, wholeheartedness, and restoration.
I’m asking myself questions that help me push forward when I feel confused, afraid, or uncertain:
Is this decision being led by my core values?
What can I do in this situation to lean into my core values?
Am I staying true to my core values by pursuing this opportunity or making this decision?
Am I living out my core values in a way that allows me continue to be at home within myself?
I want my faith to lead every single decision that I make. I want my deep trust in God to be at the forefront of my life and evident in my actions and decisions. My faith leads me to believe that there is goodness in this world and God is always working things out for our good. It shapes my perspective and outlook on life, and it guides my life.
I want to live out of a place of wholeheartedness, allowing myself to be all-in, letting my yeses be enthusiastic yeses. I want to allow myself to feel my feelings and experience all that life has to offer without allowing it to impact my faith and trust in God. Wholeheartedness guides the way that I choose to relish in simple and good things and wear my heart on my sleeve.
I want to seek restoration in the way that I interact with this world, leaving things better than I found them. I want to make this world a better place, solving problems, loving others well, and using my skills to make things better.
You can probably tell that I’m an enneagram one with a strong two wing with these values (strong contenders for my list were also clarity, authenticity, order, truth, and integrity). I’ve always sought to bring goodness to this world and make it better. My core values lead me in my writing and in my personal and professional life. Giving myself time to process and reassess what’s important to me gives me even the smallest spark to continue to love others well and encourage them in their faith.
Now, I want to encourage you to consider what your core values are. What are the things that guide your life? It could be things like peace, harmony, or wellness. Perhaps it’s grace, love, or connection. Consider what things get you fired up and light a fire beneath you. Make a list and narrow it down to 2-3 words. Once you have your values, consider tangibly how you desire for your core values to be evident in your life. How exactly do you want to utilize them in your decision making and ability to make this world a better place? Share them with a friend who can help to hold you accountable to your core values.
As you walk between the pines of your faith journey, your core values will help keep you focused on what’s important to you and what God is calling you to do (hopefully those are the same thing). They continue to help me refocus and grasp what my purpose and calling are here on this earth.
I know they can do the same for you too, friend.